Ten years after accidentally starting a blog, a disturbingly competent man asked what I was doing with my life.
I panicked and told him I was writing a book.
The only problem was I wasn’t.
Tag: romance
Mr. Living Room
Since lockdown first set in, I have been in self-isolation with precious little opportunity to rebound date or meet anyone new beyond the, even duller than usual, dating apps… “Hi, what you up to?” “Nothing, what you up to?” “Nothing.” Yep, lockdown is doing precisely jack shit for my withering love-life. Which is why when…
Dear St. Valentine…
I find myself single again this Valentines day but for the first time I won’t be pouring myself a large glass of self pity pinot. I am single firmly by choice. I ain’t even looking. Not really. I’m “on the apps” sure, but it’s gonna take a hella hunk to pin this sister down I’m…
5. Grape Expectations.
I’m back in Spain, and it’s my sister’s 29th birthday. My sister goes by Woozy Boos, which is my mum’s doing. I was nicknamed Woody as a child, for no logical reason, and things escalated from there. Anyway. A 29th birthday apparently means only one thing in my goofy world: I must dress as a…
4. 24 hours in BCN
It takes until late afternoon for my disappointment about the love tryst, that never truly was, to dissipate. I had the very real feeling that Craig David would have made a great couple. The hangover however is a bit more stubborn to shift. After the obligatory lying groggily, staring at the ceiling for several hours…
3. Mrs. Craig David
I’m still working on my vegan empire; so I decided the best way for me to champion said plant-based plight was to purchase some outlandish fruit & veg themed ensembles & pose awkwardly along the Mallorcan coastline?! Look, I don’t know why. I had the vague notion, possibly due to absorbing one too many Instagram…
1. Where is He?
“Hi I’m Jade… 5’10 with heels, keen netballer, fun maximiser, holiday fiend & all round catch. Looking for a partner in crime to explore the globe with. Must like laughing & adventure. A passion for vegetables, a bonus.” That was me. Encapsulated in a dating app nutshell. The latest reincarnation of my profile that I…